So I’ve left Nottingham now. I might make the odd return to the library and see friends but basically that’s that. And damn its been fun especially since January after which I found myself a good team, got involved with the magazine, understood the city, later moved house to Lenton and wallowed in the pleasant odour of plentifulness. Plenty of nights out, barbecues and parties. I was on campus far more, less isolated than before and met a very good crowd with whom I could deviate.
The year has been so fast. Its difficult to grasp its half-wholeness. Andalucia with V was nearly four months ago. That’s the time I really can’t fathom. But while I may never fully understand, I suppose we can never really except to say Joy and bright minds can lead you far. The course in the second semester was far more challenging and interesting but I never struggled, instead content to load up my essay with movie, music and love references. I wanted my teachers to finish them with a smile on their face. Maybe hug their partners and open a bottle of wine. They were a labour of love but without the humbug. I wrote about people, how to improve our lives, bring us together and to some understanding. I can’t fault my love.
So now I have my dissertation building a case to conceptually destroy Cameron’s Big Society, highlighting inherent and possible deliberate malevolence. I like some of the ideas. Its trying to build social capital and cohesion, an admirable cause and certainly one I support. But building capital requires capital not just good will and hope. I don’t think Cameron is only trying to reduce the state through Big Society, using some outward chatter and inwards malice. But I also don’t think ‘Britain is broken.’ It is strained under the pressures of neo-liberal capitalism and modern conveniences. We are now so connected and yet see each other less. We are a clan species traditionally to rely on each other for forage and to keep the wolves at bay. Our pre-historic genes remain the indifference to ‘progress’ but we spend our time behind firewalls, constantly told there are dangers to avoid. Its depressing but look at us in summer, sitting the park smiling and laughing. And we do this instinctively because we arent broken. Just downtrodden and isolated. Change the rhetoric and let’s move on from there.
But you’ll have to read this masterpiece when its finished. I wanna do Charlie’s too :). The mind is pretty clear. And for that I’m grateful. Its good to be me right now. I’m lucky. The future involves possibly moving more into law, especially humanitarian law working on project to initiate a shift from emergency or long-term development to national sovereignty and sustainable development outside of the present system. Small scale projects are helpful but the poor fundamentals of African/Asia poverty (Africa is poorer now than in 1960) means we are clearly doing a lot wrong. Having fucked Africa once, we shouldn’t be doing it again.
I need to talk to some friends, either Gearoid, Sean, Gemma, Aaron, Si, Cath and Michele before I commit to this. We’ll see. All is well.